A woman with long gray hair,  swinging on a sturdy vine,  swooped into the clearing and approached the box.  She opened it,  glanced briefly at its contents,  and turned to us with an engaging grin.
   "I don't need all this crap,"  she said.  "I just wanted to see if you were serious enough to go to some trouble."  Her eyes sparkled.  She had some age on her,  but wow,  those muscles!
    "You must really work out!"  I babbled,  without thinking.  Obviously,  vine-swinging through the jungle on a daily basis would be an adequate workout program in itself.
    Her grin widened,  showing strong white teeth.  I wondered what she ate.
      "Just what is it you guys want?  I got other stuff to do,  you know."
      Oscar and I spoke simultaneously.  "What we want is...

"Find my p-precious Petunia!"  George blurted.  "She's gone,  and Auntie M. says she was kidnapped by a giant bird or something!  Oscar says maybe you can help us."  He gazed hopefully at Minerva,  with a look so boyishly pitiful it would melt the hardest heart. Surely,  the Oracle could not remain unmoved.
     "As a matter of fact,"  she replied,  casually regarding her fingernails,  "I just happened to be glancing through my telescope at the opportune time,  quite by chance,  you understand,  and did,  indeed,  witness the aforementioned abduction,  which was not,  as you said,  by a giant bird,  but by the legendary Phoenix,  which is a different sort of creature entirely."
   I stared at her incredulously.  "Do you always talk in such long sentences?"  I couldn't seem to control my mouth today.
    Her smile seemed to me a trifle smug.  "Only when I want to make an impression.  By the way,  you haven't mentioned the rider on the back of the phoenix.  That seems to me to be a critical portion of the narrative."
    "Okay,  we're impressed!"  Oscar interrupted.  "You can talk normally,  okay?  Let's get to the important part,  which is...

in this dimension?  They aren't supposed to exist in this universe,  though they're common in the land of the Djinn,  where I was just visiting."  He looked at me.
   "Oh,  Marianne,  remind me to tell you the one about the magician and the phoenix!  See,  this genie walks into an opium den,..."
     "Later!"  I interrupted,  somewhat abruptly.  "Let's stay on track here,  before poor George has a conniption.  What would bring a phoenix out of its own dimension?"
      "Well,  for one thing,"  said Oscar,  "any phoenix I've known  would never willingly participate in such nefarious activity!"  He hurled a superior glance at Minerva.  "The magnificent creature must,  itself,  have been somehow coerced.  Did either of you get a look at the rider?"
     "It all happened so fast,"  I babbled,  "it was all a blur!"
      "Ahem!"  Minerva broke in modestly.  "As it happens,  I do recall a couple of pertinent details!  For instance,...

"...a space pirate!"  Minerva shuddered delicately,  as we all stared at her,  open-mouthed.  "They are rare,  but terrifying.  For mounts,  they capture flying creatures thought by many to be mythical.  No one knows how the poor things are coerced into cooperation with the vile scallywags.  It is thought,"  here she nodded wisely,  "to be some kind of brain-washing technique.  Or,  possibly, brain erasure by repeated exposure to certain television programs."
    "But this is awful!"  George howled.  "What could they want with my poor,  sweet baby?"
       The Oracle looked sadly at George.  "I expect you'll be getting a ransom note.  Or--where is her family?"
         George reddened and looked flustered.  "Um...

"...I'm her family now.  There was a--situation on her home planet that I
really..."  here George's eyes begged me for understanding,  or at least mercy.  "really don't want to talk about,  but I don't think her parents will be paying any ransom."  He closed his mouth firmly and refused to say another word.
   There was an awkward silence.  I broke it by saying briskly,  "Well!  In any case,  from what I know of Petunia,  your  'poor sweet baby'  won't be passively sitting around waiting to be rescued by the hunky
alpha male!  In fact,  she's probably...