"scanning the skies for an escaped phoenix ridden by..."  I looked curiously at George.  "What did you say she was?"
   George,  for some reason,  looked furious.  I suppose this kind of situation would put anyone in a bad mood.  "My beloved,"  he fumed,  is not a  'what!'  Just because she happens to be from another galaxy,  and her coloring is unfamiliar to you people,  and,  yes,  I agree that most people around here don't have tails,  but that doesn't mean..."
    Here Oscar interrupted,  probably just in time.  "Never mind all that!
The fact is,  she's  George's Sweetie Pie,  and we need to get her back!  Let's focus,  people!"  He huffed a little,  then turned to George.
"George,  I don't suppose you have any way of communicating with Petunia?"
      George looked confused,  then  brightened.  "Communicate?  Well,
no;  not unless she thinks to call me on her Smartphone!"
      All heads turned to my nephew--can we really be related?  As one,  we shouted  "What?  You mean...

"...cracking--we've got a mission,  people!"  She clapped her hands sharply.
    I smiled.  Apparently,  Minerva had decided to help us!
Her tone was authoritative.  "George!"
    "Yes,  Mistress?"  he cringed under her stern gaze.
     The seer made a visible effort to soften her voice.  "George,  you said something about  GPS?"
      "Well,"  he gulped.  "Terran marriage laws are a little restrictive,  so we had a comittment ceremony.  To make it seem more official,  we each had a GPS chip implanted.  See?"  He showed us a little bump under his collarbone.  He looked considerably cheerier.  "We could try the phone first!  I'll go get it!"  He grabbed a vine,  and scrambled up to his treehouse.
    The rest of us looked at each other,  shaking our heads.  "Well!"  I said,  "Who wants to be the one to...

"...a crowbar and some batteries.  Oscar,  check the storage shed while I finish the list."
   Just then,  George came galumphing back into the clearing,  eyes feverishly bright,  brandishing a cellphone.  "I found it!"  he announced
triumphantly,  "I'm dialling now."  Silence ensued while we all waited breathlessly.  Then George's face seemed to crumple.  "Phooey!  It went to voice mail!"
     "Well,  leave a message!"   I tried not to sound impatient.  "Tell her to call you!"
        "P-petunia?"  George turned away furtively,  but we could still hear his quavering voice.  "Honeybunny?  Um--this is George,  your
Sweet Pumpkin.  Please call me!  I've been so worried about you!  Auntie M.  saw you get carried off by that thing,  and I miss you so much!  Um,,,well,  I guess that's all.  We're going to try to track you!"
    He disconnected,  sniffling only a little.  "George,"  Oscar said kindly,  "It's very important for someone to be here in case Petunia calls,  or comes back,  and I think you're the best man for the job."
    George straightened his shoulders.   "Okay.  What are you guys going to do?"
     "We're going to find her!"  I stated firmly,  "and bring her back to you.  Oscar,  do you have your portable GPS tracker?"
      "Never leave home without it!"  He pulled it from his pocket  and set about twiddling with the controls.  "Ah, yes--here you are,  my pretty..."
Suddenly Oscar's face froze in horror.  "My word!  I know it seems impossible,  but Petunia is...

 

"...land of the Djinn!  What a coincidence,  I was just there due to that glitch in the portal!  Is it possible we could just step through and bring her back?  Assuming the glitch doesn't throw a crowbar--I mean a monkey-wrench--into our plans."
    George had several emotions struggling for priority on his dear,  lovable,  slightly stupid face.  "What happened,  do you think?  Did the kidnapper take her there?  What is the  'Land of the Djinn,'  anyway?"
    "Of course I don't know what happened,"  I said,  but this is my best guess:  Petunia managed to escape from the space pirate,  as we suspected,  at the same time rescuing the phoenix."
    "Aw,  that would be just like her,"  George put in.  "She's so sweet and kind..."  he paused to wipe away a tear.  "But why didn't she come home?  Why did she go to the Land of the Whatsis?"
     "The Land of the Djinn,"  Oscar interjected,  is,  briefly,  an alternate dimension in which genies and similar creatures live when they're not
playing tricks in bottles,  lamps,  and various other containers."  He paused to clear his throat.  "By the way,  if you should come across one, I'd strongly advise you not to make any wishes.  As for why she went there,  I suspect that's where the phoenix came from,  and she was kind enough to take it home."
    George was all but jumping up and down.  "Oh!  Oh!  Then can we just go there and get her?"
     Oscar smiled reassuringly.  "We'll go,  George.  You still need to be here in case she calls or finds her way back."
     "Oh.  Okay.  Are you going now,  then?"
      "No time like the present!"  Oscar said,  as he,  Minerva,  and I approached the shimmering portal and...

"...swirl of sand in the distance;  I think we're about to meet our welcoming committee."
   Sure enough,  as the swirl came closer,  it became a 50-foot sandstorm,  which coalesced into a 20-foot creature.  I glanced up at it with casual interest--okay,  I goggled. 
     A deep voice came from the apparition:  "Um--oh,  sorry!  I didn't mean to scare you!"  The creature shrank to man-size,  and stood before us,  smiling,  his voice now a rich baritone.  He was actually quite beautiful.  His long-lashed,  beef-gravy brown eyes looked up at the sky,  seeming to consult an invisible list.  "Yes,  yes,"  he muttered to himself,  "appear in a non-threatening form,  'cause if you scare them they'll run away..."
      I interrupted his reverie.  "Are you a real genie?"  I blurted. Sure,  he had the turned-up slippers,  the crimson pantaloons,  the turban,  the jewelled vest--but something seemed off.
      He looked offended.  "Well,  yeah!   Still in training,  I must admit.  but  sure!"  He stuck out his broad,  muscular chest;  I guess it had been a long time.  "Sure,  I'm a real genie!  Is that going to be a problem?"  His frown was probably intended to intimidate,  but I thought it was cute.
    I hastened to smile winningly.  "No,  not at all;  I've just never met one,  that's all.  You say you're in training?"
    "Yes;  my assignment today is to greet visitors to our fair land,  and find out what they're up to.  Oh,  I should introduce myself!  My full name would be too hard to pronounce or remember,  but you may call me Morrie."  He offered a deep bow,  flexing his biceps intriguingly.
      "Nice to meet you,  Morrie."  I was determined to hold it together.
"But we actually have a purpose here.  Um...I don't want to make a wish or anything,  but could you help us with...